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10 Ways to Remove Negativity from Your Life

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Have you ever come away from a conversation with a friend feeling down, empty or alone, in spite of being in a good mood at the beginning of the discussion? Do you find that you are more concerned with the drawbacks of doing something than actually doing it? Or, does the thought of going into your office make you feel sick?  If you said yes to any of these questions, you are most likely in the presence of negativity.

Negativity is all around us and doesn’t always present itself in an obvious way. Is a matter of fact, there are three sources from which negativity usually breeds: Negativity in your relationships, negativity within yourself and negativity within your environment.  Whether you are receiving it from one or all sources, here are some things you can do to reduce the negativity in your life:

Negativity in Your Relationships

  1. Minimize Toxic Relationships. You all have heard me say this before: Remove toxicity from your life.  Toxic relationships often come hand-in-hand with negativity.  If an individual makes you feel bad about yourself, what you do, how you are, then the person is toxic.  Toxic people often make others feel badly in order to feel better about themselves.  Unfortunately,  these individuals can be family, making it difficult to completely remove them from your life.  In these cases, minimize the time you spend with them and work on cultivating healthier, happier relationships.
  2. Set Clear Boundaries. Set boundaries with the negative people in your life. If they cross a line and they go too far with their commentary, then let them know that although you love them and care for them, their negativity isn’t welcome.  Explain to them that if they can’t be positive or respectful, then you can’t be around them.
  3. Find Positive People. The more you surround yourself with positive, high energy people, the less room you have for those who are negative.  Have you ever had a friend who made you feel special, gave you more confidence, even made you feel empowered?  This is the type of person who brings positivity into your life.

Negativity within Yourself

  1. Focus on the Whats and Not the What ifs. Many of us let fear and anxiety impair our ability to move forward and achieve the things that will bring happiness into our lives.  Negativity feeds on fear and anxiety.  As a result, focus on the things you want to do and imagine yourself doing them.  Push out the fear and the anxiety and instead, imagine the positive feelings and happiness you’ll get from doing the things you want to do.
  2. Meditate. Meditation can come in many forms.  You can meditate through more traditional formats such as yoga or deep breathing, or just by carving in some “alone” time by yourself.  The goal here is to spend some time on a daily basis, clearing your mind, ridding it of negative thoughts and refocusing it on those that are positive.
  3. Do What You Love. Enjoying the things you love allows you to feel positive, happy and joyful. When we do things that feel good and that bring us happiness, we disengage negativity.
  4. Think Positively. Although I’m not that well versed in the “law of attraction,” there is a lot of truth to being the master of your own destiny. You may have heard the saying, “positive thoughts beget positive results.”  The more negatively we think, the more negative things will happen. However, the more positive we are and the more we believe in ourselves, the more positive things will come our way.

Negativity within Your Environment

  1. Love What You Do and Where You Do it. Granted, when times are tough, we may not have the luxury of being too picky in this area.  But, when we work with people who are negative, it can be draining.  Further, if the morale of the company is really low, your work environment can have a tremendously negative impact on you and your overall outlook. If this is the case, look for a new job and seek out a company that is known for having a healthy, positive culture.  There may even be an opportunity in another department within your existing company.
  2. Love Where You Live. Our neighborhood can have a big impact on our outlook. Whether something distasteful has happened in your community or you just don’t get positive vibes from your neighbors, it may be time to move.
  3. Get Involved. Get involved in your local community. Do some charity work. Get involved with a non-profit. Be a big brother or sister. Getting involved in philanthropic programs makes a positive impact on the world around you, ultimately making you feel positive about yourself and about life.

Don’t let negativity bring you down. Make it a thing of the past and see how positive life can be! Have you conquered negatively recently? What did you have to do?

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Posted in Brett's Blog, Mind-Body Tagged with: , , ,
  • John

    Brett, I agree with your points and they are helpful if one practices them regularly. On the topic of negativity I came across a very inspiring video post “Think Positive” by Vineet Nayar. You might want to see this.
    http://www.vineetnayar.com/think-positive/

    • Brett

      Thanks John!

  • TMJ

    This was a wonderful article. The way I have learned to deal with my own personal negativity is by journaling, whenever I feel mad, insecure, or fearful I journal about it and why I feel that way. and this happens atleast once or twice a week. To me when you are honest with your feelings you’ll most instantly feel better. I have good friends around me and I know how to have fun, but I know who to have which conversations with, and who to create strong boundaries with.Also, I find being upfront with people people is a good way to clear the air and setting a boundary, bc they will pretty much know to not bring their mess into your life and they will know why you cut them back and stop talking to them just based off of what you may have told them from the beginning. Luv it!

  • namrata

    it was gr8 reading this article…………… it told me many things aabt positive livin.
    THANK YOU
    it was really a guiding light o how to live a stress free and positive life

    • frnd

      hmm

      • frnd

        trust in ur heart. u will find peace.

  • http://www.priyaram78.blogspot.com priya

    very nice website. thanks a lot.

  • Mitsy

    My toxic person is a co-worker who used to be one of my best friends. Her controlling boyfriend has succeeded in isolating her from her friends. Her personality has changed a lot within the last year. She’s moody & has been hateful, at times, to me as well as other co-workers. I tried talking to her about her behavior a few times but she basically shut me out & did not want to discuss anything. Now, I no longer call her or pretend that we were once close friends. I try to maintain our work relationship because I don’t have much choice in working w/her. Thankfully, it’s only 1 or 2 nights a week that I have to deal w/her. When she got hateful with another fairly new co-worker about work hours, both the newbie & myself talked to our supervisor about this woman’s attitude. I think something was said to my “toxic” friend because she’s been better overall in recent weeks. But, the damage has been done to our friendship. There were too many disappointment, too many hurt feelings over the last 8-9 months for me to pretend that things could ever be fixed between us. She blew off my birthday last year only to take me out to lunch with a whole group of people a MONTH after my birthday. We had always done dinner or lunch w/just the 2 of us before. I’m sure her boyfriend has had a hand in how she conducts any other aspects of her life, but I’m basically done w/her. If we did not have to see each other at work, I would not have any contact w/her at all. Since making the decision to no longer work on a dead friendship, I’ve found myself feeling more uplifted as this toxic person drug me down very badly.

  • Deangilo

    Thank you for this info now i know what to do to erase all the negativity out of my life my soul my body my mind my heart & out of my spirit i will meditate for about 20-25 mins a day & wipe my entire life/world of negativity so people (friends family & others) can enjoy me being around more

  • ARwin

    Thanks for the article ! Recently i just came to know that many people that i love & care so much are trying to degrade me as i am enjoying my life full of happiness & fun even though i am not rich or in a greater level like them. First i got angry & felt bad for wasting my love for the people that don’t deserve. Now i am just doing a simple thing, just ignoring them completely from my life. I don’t hate them but i just stopped to love them anymore coz i don’t allow someone to ruin my happiness.

    My piece of words to everyone : “Try to make others happy, if not at least don’t make them sad.”

    Love & Peace

  • ARwin

    If some one else then u can just ignore them but in ur case it’s ur own mother. So just take her out one day & sit with her in a calm environment & explain how much u love her & explain softly abt how u feel bad for the negativity that she brings into u. I am sure she will understand it. Keep smiling & spread the same. Cheers

  • Linda

    My toxic relationship was with a friend I considered to be like family. I told her my secrets and confided in her. Then I noticed a change in her behaviour towards me and on two occasions I found out she was taking about me behind my back and the people she was talking to ‘twisted’ what was said – making me the BAD person when in fact I wasn’t she chose to believe the lies and basically this was drama I did not need in my life. I mean what person in the right mind would tolarate this kind of person. To this day I don’t know why she was the way she was. As I have other friends and they are not like that. The bottom line is she was jealous of me and my life. Instead of being happy for me and lifting me up and moving forward with me – she despised me but sadly it took me over 15 years to realise this as I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. I have now cut her out of my life and I am so happy. When she hears good news from other people we both know – that will be my small karma release cause she will never be happy if I am happy but I am a very positive and straight forward person and I am always rising to the top. She doesn’t like that. God riddance to her is what I say. And thank god for showing me the true person she was.